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Swinger Dictionary: Full Swap/Soft Swap

Full swap:  A couple that enjoys sexual pleasure with others that includes anything up to and including intercourse.

Soft swap: A couple that enjoys sexual pleasure with others that includes much, but does not include intercourse.

It is important that you learn the difference between “soft” and “full” swap, that you are your partner decide early how far you are willing to go, and that you are up front and honest with potential play dates.  

Many couples begin their foray into swinging as a soft-swap couple - taking it slow and steady to make sure they can handle the emotional and physical issues that arise from swinging and watching your partner with another person.  Others hop headlong into the lifestyle knowing (or at least thinking) they are prepared.

We caution that you discuss your limits in an open and honest fashion before you ever even create an on-line profile, contact another couple, or seduce a friend into bed (“We’ll decide when it happens” is a terrible answer and a recipe for disaster).  Once you’ve found new partners, learn and understand their expectations.  Your rules can change early and often, depending on your experience, confidence, and experiences.  Swinging offers a variety of social and sexual interactions.  All are legitimate, depending on your level of comfort.

Two of our more awkward swinging situations came when we failed to discuss boundaries openly with a couple we had just met.  Each instance was very similar - we met a couple at lifestyle club and had instant chemistry.  Both times we danced, touched, and kissed - making ourselves all hot and bothered - before removing our foursome to a more private area.  But in each case, we failed to attain their rules and boundaries until we were naked, thus assuring a totally awkward conversation.

Know your boundaries and limits.  Know the boundaries and limits of the people you are swinging with.  Always respect your primary partner and your new friends.  Understand that an honest conversation with your clothes on is always better than a clumsy discussion in the buff.

Swingers
Swingers: www.SwingLifeStyle.com